Supporting your child’s development (toddler and preschool)

These ideas support your toddler’s development through everyday play.

Communication

How your child understands and shares information using sounds, words, gestures, or other ways to communicate.

• Point to pictures in books and name what you see (objects, body parts, animals).
• Play naming games at home: “Where’s your cup?” “Show me your shoes.”
• Sing action songs like or Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes.
• Offer a choice: “Do you want the ball or the spoon?” Then wait for a reply.

Gross Motor skills

How your child uses the big muscles in their body to move, play, and get around.

• Make a safe obstacle course with cushions or boxes to climb over or go around.
• Help early walking: have your toddler walk between two people.
• Go to the park to try small slides, rockers, or swings.
• Roll or kick a soft ball back and forth together.

Fine Motor skills

How your child uses their hands and fingers to hold, pick up, and handle small objects.

• Let your toddler eat soft finger foods to practise picking up small pieces.
• Tape paper to the table and offer chunky crayons for scribbling.
• Try posting games (cards into a box slot, items into a pot).
• Offer spoons, cups, funnels, and scoops for pouring and filling.

Problem‑solving skills

How your child learns, explores, and works things out during play and daily activities.

• Play hiding games with toys (under a cup or cloth) and ask, “Where did it go?”
• Sort laundry or toys into simple groups (socks, cars, blocks).
• Build towers with boxes or plastic containers.
• Let your toddler open safe tubs or boxes to find a small surprise inside.

Personal–social skills

How your child manages simple self‑care and joins in with others at home, nursery, or in play.

• Let your toddler help with small jobs: Find shoes, bring a spoon, tidy toys.
• Offer two toys and let your toddler choose.
• Play turn‑taking games like rolling a ball or passing items back and forth.
• Join local play sessions so your toddler can play alongside other children. Visit the Leeds Children’s centres page

Want more ideas? See our useful links section.

Simple ideas you can try at home to support your child’s development.

Communication

How your child understands and shares information using sounds, words, gestures, or other ways to communicate.

• Sing action rhymes and do the moves together (for example, ring around the rosy, London Bridge).
• Tell a short story and pause so your child can finish an easy word or line.
• Talk about body parts, colours, shapes, and simple describing words during daily routines.
• Use pretend play with dolls or toy animals and say the actions as you play.

Gross Motor skills

How your child uses the big muscles in their body to move, play, and get around.

• Play Follow the Leader: tiptoe, walk backward, take big steps, then small steps.
• Make a safe obstacle course with pillows or boxes to climb over or crawl under.
• Try animal walks like bear walk, rabbit hops, or elephant steps.
• At the park, practise jumping, climbing, and sliding.

Fine motor skills

How your child uses their hands and fingers to hold, pick up, and handle small objects.

• Draw together: Make large shapes and let your child colour them in.
• Play with playdough: Roll, press, and cut simple shapes.
• Try simple printing or painting (potato prints or blowing thin paint with a straw).
• Trace around cups, blocks, or hands to make easy outlines.

Problem‑solving skills

How your child learns, explores, and works things out during play and daily activities.

• Sort things into big and little, or into groups like food, animals, toys.
• Build with boxes or blocks.
• Play hide‑and‑seek with toys under cups or cloths.
• Make easy puzzles by cutting a picture into two or three pieces.

Personal–social skills

How your child manages simple self‑care and joins in with others at home, nursery or in play.

• Offer simple choices (two shirts, two snacks, two drinks).
• Let your child help: Wash toy dishes, dolls, or clothes.
• Play pretend together (pets, shop, camping, a small grocery store).
• Help your child set the table or tidy toys to build early independence.

When to stop using bottles

It is recommended to stop using bottles and teats from 12 months old and move to an open cup or free‑flow cup.

Why this matters

• Bottles can cause tooth decay, especially if used for milk or sugary drinks.
• Long‑term bottle use can affect mouth development and speech.
• Learning to sip from a cup is better for teeth and helps your child develop new skills.

Tips to help your child move to a cup

• Start offering sips of water from a cup from around 6 months, especially with meals.
• Choose an open cup or free‑flow cup (with no valve).
• Expect some mess at first, this is normal and part of learning.
• Keep bottles for milk only and aim to phase them out completely by 12 months.
• Give lots of praise for trying the cup.

When to stop dummy use

The NHS recommends starting to reduce dummy use from around 6 months, with the aim to stop between 6 to 12 months.

This helps reduce long‑term issues with teeth and speech.

Why this matters

• Dummies can change how children’s teeth grow.
• They can stop the tongue from moving freely.
• When a child has a dummy in their mouth, it is harder to babble, chat and practise new sounds. Helping them give it up gives them more chances to talk and build language skills.

Top tips for reducing dummy use

• Keep the dummy for sleep times only.
• Offer other comfort items, a teddy, blanket, or extra cuddles.
• Take the dummy out when your child is making noises or trying to chat.
• Wait until your child asks for the dummy instead of giving it automatically.
• Be consistent and give lots of praise.
• Try a sticker chart or reward system for older toddlers.

Visit the Dummies and weaning: How and when to stop dummy use page for more information.

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Children aged 5 and under are learning so much about how to talk, move, play and understand the world.

Their brains grow best when they can explore, play and interact with people around them.

Screens are part of everyday life for many families, and it’s about finding a healthy balance that works for you and your child.

How young children learn best

Babies and toddlers learn most when:

• someone talks with them
• someone shows them things
• they play and explore with other people

These real‑life interactions help their brains develop curiosity and communication skills.

Too much screen time can reduce curiosity, because babies learn by watching faces and doing “serve and return”,
someone talks → the baby reacts → they take turns.
Screens take away this important learning time.

Recommended screen time limits

• Under 1 year: No screen time advised
• 1 to 2 years: Very little screen time, always with an adult
• 2 to 5 years: Up to 1 hour a day maximum, but less is better

Make screen time interactive

If your child does use a screen, sit with them when you can.

Watching together means you can:

• chat about what’s happening
• answer questions
• encourage them to think, join in or relate it to real life

Screens work best as part of, not instead of, everyday play and talking.

Real play matters most

Children under 5 learn best from:

• face‑to‑face time
• free play
• exploring
• talking, singing and reading with adults

These activities help build speech and language, confidence, movement skills and imagination.

Healthy screen time habits

Before bed

Screens give off blue light, which can stop the sleep hormone melatonin from working. This makes bedtime routines harder. A calm routine, like a bath, cuddle and bedtime story, can help children settle more easily.

At mealtimes

Eating together as a family also helps children learn healthy habits by watching the adults around them. Screens distract children from eating and stop them noticing when they feel full.

Being a positive role model helps children develop healthy eating habits.

For more information, visit Best Start in Life: Baby and toddler screen time page.

Babies, toddlers and young children show their feelings through behaviour. Behaviour is a type of communication, and children often express big feelings before they have the words to explain them.

Think of it like an iceberg, what you see on the surface, shouting, crying, saying “no”, running off, is only the top.

Under the surface are feelings such as tiredness, overwhelm, hunger, worry, excitement, frustration or needing attention.

It takes time to understand what your child needs, and that’s okay.

• For more guidance on bonding, understanding your baby’s cues, and supporting their emotional development, visit our Infant mental health: Understanding your baby page.
• For more support with understanding toddler feelings, behaviour and early emotional development, visit our my toddler and me page. It offers helpful videos, tips and guidance for parents of toddlers.

Top tips to support your child’s behaviour

1. Think about their developmental stage

Young children behave the way they do because their brains and bodies are still developing.

They are still learning how to:

• manage their feelings
• wait or share
• explain what they need

What feels “small” to an adult can feel huge to a young child.

2. Consider the “why” behind the behaviour

Instead of thinking “They’re being difficult,” try thinking:

• “Are they tired?”
• “Are they hungry?”
• “Is it too noisy or busy?”
• “Do they need comfort or attention?”

Watching what happens before, during and after a behaviour can help you spot patterns. A simple 2 to 3 day diary can help you notice:

• when it usually happens
• what triggered it
• what helps things get better

3. Check the basics

Children feel safer when life feels predictable. Behaviour often improves when daily routines are steady.

Ask yourself:

• are meals and snacks regular?
• do they get enough active play?
• is the bedtime routine calm and consistent?
• are there big changes happening at home or nursery?

Small changes can make a big difference.

4. Plan ahead for tricky moments

If you know something is difficult for your child, you can:

• prepare them in advance
• keep tasks short
• distract with a toy, snack or simple game

Planning helps children feel more secure.

Positive ways to respond

• Respond with empathy and gentle boundaries:
  
  • You can still hold limits, but with understanding.
  • For example:

“I can see you’re upset because you wanted more time. It’s still time to leave. Let’s do it together.”

Say what to do

• Children learn best when they hear a clear, positive instruction:
  •  “We walk indoors.”
  •  “Kind hands.”
  •  “Feet on the floor.”

Avoid negative instructions (“don’t run”), as children often tune out the “don’t”.

Praise the behaviours you want to see

• Be specific and quick:

“You used kind hands, lovely sharing.”

“You came when I called, great listening.”

• Praise effort, not perfection:

“You started tidying when I sang the tidy‑up song, great try.”

Specific praise helps children repeat helpful behaviours.

When things feel tricky

Connect first

Get to their level, use a gentle voice and show you understand.

“I can see you’re having fun with your cars. It’s hard to stop when you’re enjoying yourself.”

Ask for the action

Say what to do. Give a clear, simple instruction.

“It’s tidy‑up time now. Can you put the cars in the box, please?”

Limit and offer choice

Hold the rule  but offer two choices your child can manage.

“We need to tidy up now. Would you like to put the cars away first, or the blocks?”

Move on

Help them follow through, then praise the effort.

“You put the cars in the box, thank you. That was really helpful. Now we can wash hands for snack.”

• The HENRY Parenting Programme (0 to 5) offers an 8‑week course to help families build healthy routines, enjoy mealtimes, understand children’s behaviour, and feel more confident in everyday parenting. Find out more or sign up for HENRY
• Leeds Children’s centres offer local groups, play sessions, and family support for babies and young children. The website helps you find activities and services near you that can support your child’s learning and development.
• https://leeds.50thingstodo.org/app/os#!/welcome 50 things to do before you’re 5 gives families simple, low‑cost activity ideas to help young children learn through play. The website and app offer practical suggestions you can use at home, outdoors, or in your local area to support your child’s early development.
• Baby Buddy is a free, trusted app and website that gives parents and carers easy‑to‑understand advice about pregnancy, baby care, and child development. It offers daily tips, videos, and guidance to help you feel confident during your baby’s early months.
• NHS Best Start in Life: Playtime and bonding with your toddler
• 0 to 3 Tiny Happy People (BBC) shares simple, fun ideas to help you talk, play, and interact with your baby or young child. It offers videos, activities, and tips to support speech, language, and early communication.
• The Best Start in Life website has clear, trusted advice to help you support your toddler’s development. It covers everyday topics such as talking, emotions, teeth care, play ideas, meals, and childcare support. You can also find NHS‑backed information on learning, health, and getting your child ready for nursery and school.
• Health for Kids is a fun NHS website that helps children learn about their physical and emotional health. It includes simple information, games, and videos about keeping healthy, managing feelings, common illnesses, and getting help. There is also a grown‑ups section with clear advice for parents and carers on supporting children’s health and wellbeing.